Tag Archive | awkward moment

My socially awkward moments – Part 3

Another part of my series of articles about my socially embarrassing situations. Read part 1 and part 2.


I have to confess that I have another very bad habit. I sing a lot. I know, theres nothing wrong with singing. Unless you do it too much. My family got already used to it. Its considered perfectly normal in our house when I randomly start singing and shouting. I perform every day in the shower:

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Me and my sister love to sing together, it’s our favorite thing to do on weekends.


The problem is that I love singing too much. Sometimes I get an uncontrollable urge to sing. And the worst thing is when that happens in a public place. In such case I have no choice but to repress this urge as much as I can.

But sometimes Im walking on a street when I feel a strong desire to sing. The street looks empty, no one is around. So I take a risk and start singing. Usually I dont get caught, but it happened to me a few times that out of nowhere, a person appeared a few meters from me. Its like they literally manifested out of nowhere, and of course, theyve heard me singing. In this situations I feel extremely uncomfortable. As much as Im okay when my family hears me singing, when a stranger hears me singing, I feel like I want to disappear out of this world.

I just walk away and act like nothing happened.

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One time an awkward moment happened when I was casually having my concert while home alone. I sang my favorite songs REALLY LOUDLY. Suddenly the door bell rang and I went to open the door. It was a postwoman. She had this weird grin on her face while she was giving me my letters. As she was leaving, she told me that I have a nice voice and I should audition for X-Factor. Till this day I have no idea if she really meant it or it was supposed to be sarcasm… But I felt really awkward afterwards. I should have realized that the whole street could hear me when I was singing.

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One thing I hate is doing presentations in front of people. Sadly you cant avoid them while you’re in school. Im always extremely awkward when I speak in public. I tend to have nervous tics, I stutter, I mumble words which make no sense or forget everything that Ive learned.

I could tell you many awkward stories about how I failed my presentations, but one of them really stands out. Once I actually ran away in the middle of my presentation and went to the bathroom. Yes, you read well. My presentation was so poor and so very bad. I stuttered at every word, I forgot almost everything I wanted to say and I was so red in my face like a tomato. I choked hard and stood there, completely quiet, with my face searching for something I couldn’t find really hard, while my eyes were just staring at people with this blank face. You guys should’ve heard the ABSOLUTE SILENCE while I was struggling horribly to find something to say…

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People were just gawking at me with their eyes and mouths open……

Aladdin Genie agape jaw drop

The longer I was standing here trying to remember something and save this awkward situation, the worse I was feeling. And the more I needed to go to the bathroom… Ive literally felt like I was going to vomit in front of everyone. So what did I do? I did what I know best: I ran away.

Nope Octopus

Without saying a word I stormed out of the class, shut the door and ran to the toilet. I bet everyone was just sitting there with their mouths open asking themselves what did just happen. Everyone already knew that I was awkward, but no one expected me to run away so suddenly. The teacher sent another girl to the toilet to check if Im alright. I wasnt alright of course. I felt like vomiting, crying and ending my life at the same time. After I calmed down a little bit I wasnt sure what to do next. Should I return to the classroom and finish my presentation? Or should I return, sit on my place and act like nothing happened? When I came back to class, no one forced me to finish my presentation anymore. Thankfully, no one was laughing at me, they all looked at me like they were regretting me probably thinking: “Poor girl, she has a serious problem. I wouldnt want to be on her place”. Well, this story is maybe more sad than funny…


Ill admit it. My thoughts are really weird. If someone could see what is happening in my head, they would think I‘m psycho.

I do remember once, a long time ago, I was in class and I was staring really hard at this pencil.

And the guy next to me is like: “Hey… what are you doing…?”
Me: “Well, I was trying to imagine what it would be like if the only two entities in the universe were me and this pencil.”

The way he looked at me…

Woah!


I never know how to handle eye contact… I tend to swing between two extremes. In social situations involving conversations, either my gaze is lost in space, fixed on some random point while nonetheless listening to whoever’s talking (at least for the first five seconds if it’s something I’m supposed to be listening to, less if I don’t care, and more if I do, but yeah, I inevitably drift off), or, I look directly into their eyes, which does take conscious effort. This means I don’t blink for a prolonged period of time, and the look I give, as it’s been described to me by others, suggests either that I’m planning to kill them or that I’m ripping their mind or soul open (or something to that effect)…I had a staring contest with a friend, she ended up freaking out a bit and continuously asking me to please blink. My reply: “Hold on, I’m pushing for a new personal record.” It appears hostile, in any case, and yet I don’t mean it. But I do tend to avoid eye contact with strangers, sometimes even acquaintances, or pretend I didn’t see them.

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Another weird thing that I do a lot is that I make corresponding facial expression to my inner conversations. It happens to me all the time. Walking on a street, sitting in a bus, in a classroom… I‘m having an interesting conversation with myself in my own head and I don’t realize that the emotions I feel so deeply inside are evident on my face. This makes other people think I’m completely insane.


The thing I struggled probably the most with during my time in school was solving math problems in front of the entire class. Dont get me wrong, Im not stupid and math wasnt a big problem for me. The problem I have is that when I am called to perform in front of people, I suddenly forget everything I know, even my own name. If you asked me how much is 2+2, I would probably just look at you with a stupid gaze on my face and the answer wouldnt hit me. Thats how bad it is.

Ive had a panic attack every single time a teacher called me to solve a math problem in front of a blackboard.

It always resulted in public humiliation. The weird thing about it was that the teacher knew that I wasnt stupid and math really isnt the problem. I used to get best grades in tests. But in front of a whole class I acted like I was retarded.

After a few failed attempts, the teacher realized that I probably wont get better at it. So the funny thing was that each member of the class solved something on the blackboard and the only person who always got left out was me.


A situation that happens to me a lot:

Person: Oh my god, I love your dress! The color really suits you!
Me: Thanks! I like yours too. It’s, um…

(Internal dialogue: it suits her? No, she just said that to you, it’ll sound like you’re copying her. Nice color? Not only did she say that to you, but you’ve already said that to at least four different people today, you can’t just go around saying the same compliment to everyone. Good things about dresses, good things about dresses… damn, what are some good things about dresses? Cut? No, only people who are actually in the fashion business can talk about “cut” without sounding stupid. Size? No, always gets misconstrued as a fat joke. That decorative thing on the front? You don’t even know what it’s called! Damn, she obviously realizes by now that you’re struggling to come up with something…)
Me: I have no more compliments left!
Person: …Ooookay.

I honestly did like the dress.

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My socially awkward moments – Part 2

Because my life is full of awkward moments and embarrassing situations, Ive decided to write a second part to my article “My socially awkward moments“. Here are another socially awkward stories from my life that are only a proof that Im a queen of social awkwardness. Enjoy!


The following story sounds like something you would see in a movie. I really wish I could say I made it up.  But I swear to God, it really happened. I attract these awkward situations like a magnet…

A few years ago we had a student exchange program in Germany. This embarrassing situation happened during my first dinner with the entire family of my German exchange partner. It was a formal setting with a large group of people. I was wearing a red dress and shoes with high heels.

This is an accurate example of how other girls walk in heels vs. how I walk in heels (Im the one on the left if you didnt guess it):

She's weak, ignore her

While we were making plans for dinner, I leaned back on my heels and, you guessed it, the heel of my boot snapped off. Just one. So I’m terrified, trying to think of what to do. Her mother and sister were sympathetic, but I was so embarrassed…

But it gets better.

I tend to act completely retarded when I eat in public.

Eating withyour mouth open

We ate a tomato soup for dinner and me being my awkward self, I splashed the whole soup all over my dress.

So here I am, walking around with one of the heels of my boots gone, tomato soup all over the front of my dress… I’m done. I want to leave.

Oh, but it gets better.

As I say goodbye to the family, I go to wave, and a hard metal bracelet I had on, FLIES OFF my wrist, and just misses hitting her mom in the head. Luckily, her whole family has a decent sense of humor. Her dad said something like: “We better get out of here before her clothes fall off!”

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I was absolutely mortified. I got in my room and cried for twenty minutes.

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Something I absolutely hate and Im sure that a lot of you had to deal with this as well: speaking to someone you dont know on the phone.

So… say I have to call a bank for some reason. After an hour of putting it off and procrastinating, I finally dial their number. Then the person at a bank answers the phone and theyre like: “Yes, of course I can help you! Im just gonna need to ask you a few questions first.” Then this person bombards me with hundreds of specific questions! And Im just sitting on the other line like: “Eh, hmmm, eeehh”. I get really flustered and I cant speak to them like Im a normal human being…

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Another example of my exceptional social skills is that I fail at ordering food in restaurants. First of all I spend at least 30 minutes deciding exactly what I want before I speak to anybody. But when I go to order and they say what I want isnt available, or if they start asking if I want extras or if I want my food in a certain way… Well you know what, at this point you might as well just bring me a DAMN COCONUT because Ive lost every thought that was in my brain!

So I usually just end up saying yes and getting whatever they give me. Im sure one day I will end up with a coconut…

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Im an expert in dropping things. I literally drop things for no reason! I will be walking along, perfectly fine, and then all of a sudden, my brain will just cut out and I will drop whatever Im holding.

Rafiki Drops Simba

Usually it isnt that much of a problem, but sometimes it can be a real limitation of my life.

For example, my mom asks me to carry some stuff she just bought from her car. Ill pick up a glass bottle and guess what, Ill drop it. Im carrying a basket full of laundry upstairs and in the middle of the stairs, Ill drop it. Or someone tells me: “Pass the salt”. And I drop it. A friend asks me: “Hold my bag for a second”  and I drop it on the floor. Its not easy keeping friends when youre like this…

Afterwords Im like: “Oh god, Im so sorry, I didnt mean to!”

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Seriously, never let me hold anything of yours that you wouldnt want if got broken or dropped in a puddle…

But the worst thing is when this happens in public. Like in the following case: I was having lunch in a school cafeteria and I had to walk through the entire room to return back my plate. It was nothing unusual, I used to do this every single day. But on that particular day, my level of social awkwardness was especially high. As I was walking, I felt extremely awkward that people were watching me. And when people are looking at me, my body stops listening to me. Suddenly, I dropped all that I was carrying in my hands on the floor! My plates with rest of food on them, my cup, my bag… Everything was laying broken on the floor. And this happened in front of 100+ people and literally all of my teachers saw it. After a few moments of dead silence, the entire cafeteria burst out laughing.

Funny

All students and classmates were laughing like it was the funniest thing they have ever seen.

Busting Up

Some of my teachers were giggling, but some of them had this stare on their faces that screamed: “Ill kill you! What have you done?!”

In that moment I didnt know what to do. Ive tried to collect the broken pieces of everything, but it just wasnt working. Then some people came and started to clean up the mess Ive made. I could still hear people laughing. In that moment I felt like the most awkward person on the planet.

After this incident my fame in school has risen to incredible heights. Ive managed to make my already horrible reputation in school even worse.

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I was in a class and we had a new teacher. The teacher asked us to introduce ourselves and say what we like to do. Everyone was saying the typical boring shit like go to clubs, dance, go out to bars, hang out with friends, sports, blah… Then I said something like this:

Me: “I like to study theories that catch my eye or fascinate me, like quantum physics, for example. Im especially intrigued with the Many-Worlds Interpretation. Im also interested in psychology, biology, astronomy and history. I would go on Wikipedia and start reading, but then I see something I am curious about and end up hopping from page to page for like three hours.” Then I realized that what I just said made me look like the biggest nerd on the planet. So in attempt to make myself look more normal, I added: “And I like traveling, listening to music, reading, writing and painting. ” (But I knew that it was too late, because everyone looked at me like I was a space alien).

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The teacher: You have now established that you are the smartest person in the room.

*awkward laughter from the entire classroom*

Me: *mental face palm*

(Not really sure whether to take that as a compliment…?) But seriously, why couldnt I just say something normal? I told them the truth and sounded like a nerd…

So since then, I officially became the queen of school nerds.

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Which is not the best position to be in, because everyone hates nerds.

nerds

Unless we were writing a test. Then suddenly everyone starts acting like theyre my best friend.

Friends Forever

Everyone wants to sit next to me, so they can copy my answers. Literally, before every exam our entire class had a fight who will get the privilege to sit next to me.

fight


I give the WORST direction advice ever. If you ever get lost and need someone to tell you how you get to a specific place, the last person you want to ask is me. I hate it when someone stops me on the street and asks me where do they find this and that street. Like why would you do that to me? I wasnt ready for you to ask me this question. Why would you expect me to know where that is? DO I LOOK INTELLIGENT?! So I usually just end up pointing in a random direction and saying: “go this way”, just so they leave me alone. I dont know how many times I did this, but I apologize to all people I caused serious trouble because of my awkwardness. I‘m sorry…

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What is the thing I am especially bad at? Dating. I mean it doesnt happen very often because, OBVIOUSLY, who would ask ME on a date? But if it happens, I make sure that I make a complete fool of myself. Usually I dont make it past the first date, because I embarrass myself so efficiently, that these people never want to see me again. Like with that one guy I talked about in the first part of this series on which I spilled my drink and then ran away. Its like when Im on a date, I lose all my intelligence, all my charm and all there is left is my awkwardness.

Another embarrassing date happened when I was at a summer camp. Dont get me wrong, I enjoyed the camp, I had a time of my life. But there was too much social interaction. 24 hours all days a week was incredibly energy draining for me. After two weeks of spending zero time alone, the only thing I craved was some alone time with my favorite book. One day I was in especially bad mood when one guy asked me out. I was soo low on energy and soo annoyed, that the last thing I wanted is to go somewhere with this guy. I knew that acting like a normal person is not going to be possible tonight. So I said “no” many times, but this guy seemed to really like me and he just didnt want to go away! So I was forced to agree.

But this time I didnt get nervous and I didnt try to impress him. I decided to do a complete opposite. I acted like a bitch on purpose. I know, it doesnt sound like me, Im usually very nice to people and Im never mean to anyone.

But this time, all I wanted was to be left alone. So I did everything I could that made me look like horrible person. I didnt talk to him very much and when I did, I made sure that I say something rude or offensive. I played the role of a cold hearted self centered narcissist very well and I think that at the end of the evening, this guy was so freaked out, that he never spoke to me again.

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Well, now I feel bad for that poor guy that I treated so badly for my own selfish reasons…

nick miller do i regret it yes gif

I hope he didnt take it personally. I can go very far from who I truly am if I dont get my alone time and if you overstimulate me with too much social interaction. So which lesson did you get from this story? Never force an introvert to socially interact with you if they are low on energy and need some time to recharge. Never underestimate the things we can do when you force us to go out!


I made a complete fool out of myself when I was getting my haircut a few years ago. Hair salons make me nervous as there are people everywhere and there are mirrors everywhere. The lighting in that salon made my face look really terrible and I just felt like I looked a mess compared to the hair stylists. 

When I get nervous and socially anxious I become really inarticulate and have a stutter. I didn’t have much to say to the girl who was cutting my hair and there were some points when I literally sounded retarded. 


Why do these things always happen to me?!!

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