Archive | June 2014

Spiritual reasons to love your body

Physical body is a machine and a vehicle for a physical experience. Our body is the vehicle we have chosen for a particular type and kind of physical experience which we call the human experience. It can also be seen as our consciousness manifested in human form. Each and every vehicle is worthy, because it serves it’s purpose. We did not come to this Earth so we would compete who came with the best looking vehicle! ūüėÄ It sounds funny but we are doing exactly the same thing when we compare our bodies.


There are no accidents and the way our bodies look like is no exception to this rule. We choose our physical appearance before coming to this life. We design our bodies in a way that corresponds to what kind of experiences we want to have in this lifetime.

When someone wants a life in which he is a famous singer or an actor and influences a lot of people, he will intentionally choose a body that corresponds to standards of beauty in that particular society. When someone wants to have an experience of being a model, she will design a body that enables her to do such a job. Teal Swan said in one interview that she remembers how before her birth, her and a group of other beings designed her body so it will be considered beautiful in all parts of the world. Her intention for this life was to reach as many people with her teachings as possible. And humans naturally pay most attention to what is attractive.

But when someone wants to have an experience as an ordinary working person, he/she doesnt need to look like a model. Most of us choose a normal appearance that doesnt stand out from a crowd. In such case we can live our life in a normal way and our appearance is not a big problem for us. Some people even choose an appearance that is considered highly unattractive. They do it because this condition gives rise to the biggest expansion in their lives. Out of the biggest contrast comes the highest level of awareness. Even a disability is something that we choose. We, the ones who came to this earth healthy, often dont understand why would someone choose such a limiting experience. But a physical disability can teach you a lot in life. Take for example Nick Vujicic. This is the story of him I found on the internet:

Imagine getting through your busy day without hands or feet. Picture your life without the ability to walk, care for your basic needs, or even embrace those you love. Meet Nicholas Vujicic. Without any medical explanation or warning, Nick was born without arms and legs. And yet, the Vujicic family was destined to cope with both the challenge and blessing of raising a son who refused to allow his physical condition to limit his lifestyle.

The early days were difficult. Throughout his childhood, Nick not only dealt with the typical challenges of school and adolescence, but he also struggled with depression and loneliness. Nick constantly wondered why he was different than all the other kids. He questioned the purpose of life, or if he even had a purpose. According to Nick, the victory over his struggles, as well as his strength and passion for life today, can be credited to his faith in God. His family, friends and the many people he has encountered along the journey have inspired him to carry on, as well.

Since his first speaking engagement at age 19, Nick has traveled around the world, sharing his story with millions, sometimes in stadiums filled to capacity, speaking to a range of diverse groups such as students, teachers, young people, business professionals and church congregations of all sizes. Today this dynamic young man has accomplished more than most people achieve in a lifetime. He’s an author, musician, actor, and his hobbies include fishing, painting and swimming.

Nick says, ‚ÄúIf God can use a man without arms and legs to be His hands and feet, then He will certainly use any willing heart!‚ÄĚ

So at the end, it does not matter what our bodies look like. You could be dying of cancer, you could have a physical disability and you could still love your body. It is all about perspective.


Me & Dancing & Sports

There are certain things in this life that I am good at.¬†Hell, even great at. I’m a good painter.¬†I’m good at writing.¬†I like to think I’m alright at putting outfits together. I am a nice person and get on with most people. I was always a fast and¬†competent¬†reader as a child. I can paint my nails really well, and I don’t even care if that doesn’t count because MAN ALIVE have I seen some terrible¬†manicures in my time.

But one thing I am totally, utterly and unbelievably terrible at is dancing.

I’m soo bad that when I was 8 years old I got kicked out of a dancing class. Probably you’re asking yourselves how exactly does a 8 year old get kicked out from a class? Let me tell you how: I attended this course for little girls where we learned how to dance. My mom used to be a professional dancer when she was younger, so she was very excited to put me in this class in hope that¬†one day I will become a dancer too. But soon her dreams were crashed because I’m nothing like my mom. I might be the worst dancer in existence. I couldn’t get any steps¬†right.¬†My movements weren’t fluid and when I danced it just looked horrible.¬†Worse than horrible.¬†I danced like I¬†was¬†being attacked by a horde of bees.

24 Absolutely Unexplainable GIFs

My teacher and other kids saw that I’m extremely bad at dancing, but at the beginning they were optimistic that it will get better over time. But I attended this course for over a¬†year and¬†no sign of improvement could be seen. I annoyed my dance instructor¬†every single time. She yelled¬†at me in front of everyone and singled me out.¬†Every other kid in class hated me because I was the reason why the teacher had to repeat each dance move at least 3 times more and I still never got it right.

One day¬†we had to perform¬†in front of quite a big audience. All of our parents, friends and relatives were here. When we were performing I was in the corner, but it didnt help because after a while I became the center of everyones attention. No one was paying attention to girls that were dancing normally anymore. Everyone was staring and pointing their¬†fingers at me asking themselves: “What is wrong with that girl over there?¬†What is she doing?” I literally screwed up every single dance move I could and I looked like a totally retarded person.

It was not the adorable kind of awkward where you would say: “Oh, she’s just shy, it’s her first performance, at least she’s trying, thats cute.” It was more like: “What the hell is wrong with this girl? What does she think shes doing? Someone kick her out so she stops ruining this dance for everyone”. After our failed performance, my teacher came to me and told me and my mom that she wishes I stopped attending this dance class. She was trying to be polite but I could sense that what she meant by this is that I’m so bad at dancing that it’s painful to look at me and to teach me anything is completely impossible. My mom was disappointed because I won’t be following her footsteps and I was disappointed in myself too, because I failed at¬†everything. On the other hand I was quite happy that I didnt have to attend that course anymore because I hated it every single second of it.

Since this incident happened, I avoided dancing as much as I could. I haven‘t¬†danced until I was 15 years old and we had dancing lessons in high school.¬†These lessons were designed to teach young people how to ballroom dance so we know how to dance in formal situations with a partner. I dont know what was I thinking when I agreed to attend these lessons. Probably I forgot how bad it was when I was 8 years old. But after my first dance lesson in school I knew that I havent gotten any better.¬†I again couldnt get any steps¬†right.


Everyone seemed to get it quickly and I was the only one standing there with a WTF face not knowing what to do. It got even worse after a few lessons when we had to dance with partners. It was always so awkward when the dance instructor told¬†the guys to come to girls and ask them to dance. All guys were so shy and they were just standing there and looking at girls like were the scariest creatures ever. But after some time they got used to it and all girls had dance partners. Except for me. I was always the only one that no guy ever asked for a dance (which after seeing my dancing “abilities” is perfectly understandable). So I usually ended up in a pair with the dance instructor himself. And that was the horror. Because now I couldnt hide in a corner and act like I dont exist. Instead¬†I had to stand in the middle of a huge hall and the dance instructor was teaching the steps on me. And that was so embarrassing. Everyone could see how bad I am and I couldnt understand how to repeat the steps he was showing me. I could hear some people in the audience laughing at my awkwardness. I felt like a complete piece of shit. And this happened many lessons in a row. Every single time we were asked to find dance partners, I was the only one without a partner so I always ended up with the instructor and I always embarrassed myself in front of more than¬†hundred people. My school reputation was before very bad¬†but after this, I became the center of everyones jokes. For me it wasnt funny at all.¬†

When the lessons ended after a few months, I was relieved. Did I learn something? NO. Until this day I have absolutely no idea how to do waltz, tango, quickstep, anything… And I guess that I never will.

I’m terrible at every damn sport I play.¬†In school during sport lessons we usually played volleyball, football or basketball. But I have a problem:

I can’t shoot in basketball, or dribble.

Slam Dunk Fail

I can’t catch or throw a damn football.

At Least You Tried

I can’t even hit the ball in tennis.

Seriously, I just am the worst sports player ever. It’s so annoying when everyone’s looking at you and you drop a football, an easy catch and everyone starts laughing at you. I embarrassed myself in front of¬†people countless times because of this.

Too bad, so sad

The teacher always picked two captains and let them choose people for their teams. And guess who always got picked as the last one? You guessed well, it was me… EVERY¬†SINGLE TIME. Because the team I was in automatically lost just because of me. There were no exceptions to this rule. During those 8 years I spent¬†playing team sports with my classmates, there was¬†not¬†one single time a team I was in won.

I think my horrible sports skills should be considered as a special power. I have never seen anyone who would always manage to screw everything up so magnificently. Even the teachers were always amazed by my inability to catch a ball and when they saw me playing for the first time, they looked with this stare like theyve never see anything like this before.